It's been long!
I know, I know I say I will post frequently and I always do this.
The past month has been a hard one.
I have been having many ups and downs and what not. I mean, what's new huh?
So, I wanted to talk about lessons.....
There are certain lessons life teaches you again and again and again. It just doesn't back down until these lessons are ingrained into your bones. Life's like that, you know. Doesn't back down and does not give two shits.
So here they are -
1.) Punctuality -
This one has slapped me in the face - I don't know how many times! And it's still at it.
Being on time is something I have been learning the hard way. I know it is such an important thing. I know what it is like to keep people waiting, because I have been there too.
But, sometimes shit happens and I do get late. I try my best but..... and that is when it stings. A voice inside starts its daily dose of criticism, saying - aha! you've done it again. You are late! meh. you are worthless....
Stupid critic. Shut up okay.
2.) Time Management -
Oh god! Where do I even start with this?! I know that this and punctuality are related, big time, but do you know how hard it is to manage time? Do not give me those stupid quotes telling - " Everyone has 24 hours, it depends on how you use it...blah blah blah.."
Well, Mr./Ms. expert-at-time-management, come here so I can shove something down your mouth.
Managing time is hard when you have to do everything yourself. Ahuh. It's easy when you work and come back to an empty room and feel tired and sleep it off.
But when you're a student and you need to study and wash your clothes and keep your health in check, it is hard!
Yup, that line fits my current dilemma perfectly.
Oh, also let me add - PEST MANAGEMENT. Stupid ants everywhere, destroying the only eatables
3.) Cleanliness -
LOL. I never thought I would be saying this! But cleanliness! I am grateful for my mom every single day. She is perfect when it comes to cleaning. I think all mothers are bent on cleanliness. But, now that I am away from home, I know how important it is to keep your environment clean. I took it for granted when mom would do everything to keep our house clean. Now, I understand how much that helped me!
Anyway, this is another lesson life is clearly whipping at me.
4.) You have no one but yourself -
Or maybe loneliness or a wave of sadness hitting you time and again.
I don't know why, maybe its just me who is concentrating on this and I don't know whether it's a positive or a negative thing either, I don't even know how to take it but for a while I've been feeling this - People just don't care. They don't give two shits about anyone.
But if I think so, then I ask myself, what about me? Am I being out there for anyone? Is anyone there who is waiting for my words? My words which will soothe them...
meh, I don't know.
Let me just say it out loud and clear. I have been and will be feeling lonely, for a loong time. And life is teaching me that I need to become independent and trust myself much much more. Be my own best friend first, understand myself.
Before, I was very proud because when left to myself, I did things by my own pace and did not whine about being lonely.
Look at me now, exactly the opposite. *tch*
Maybe it's the distance or the gut instinct in me telling that - nobody cares
Yeah, they don't.
I should not beat myself about it. *hits own cheeks*
I will come out stronger and wiser.
No Turning Back.
That is all for now, I guess...
Thank you so much.
Stay Healthy, Stay Happy.
Lots of love,